Liar, Liar! Starring Obama, Biden and Oprah

I had a dream, no not that kind of dream. I dreamed that the Democrats got hit with a case of Liar, Liar!

Just like Jim Carrey in the movie, they suddenly couldn’t tell a lie!

Here is how the dream started.

I turned on my TV and the Oprah show was coming on. Hey, I think Oprah has a new theme song. It sounds like a song I remember hearing on the radio when I was little. What is it…come on, it’s on the tip of my tongue. Oh, that’s it…

Backstabbers by the O’Jays

Women everywhere must really love how Oprah stuck it to them. She is for women! Unless there is a black guy involved. If a white tv show host did what Oprah did, the right Rev. Al and Jesse would be screaming racism and protesting…you know, pandering for corporate handouts(aka hush money).

But with her new theme song Oprah is coming clean (boy does that generate a realy ugly mental picture).

Her first guest today is none other than vice presidential candidate Joe Ferraro, I mean Geraldine Biden, damnit, it’s Joe Biden!

Wait, where’s Joe? He didn’t come on stage when prompted…uh oh, the Oprah show producer just found Mr. Biden in the Green Room arguing with a stage hand over a bag of nacho cheese Dorito’s!

Biden: What is this delicious snack? They don’t serve food like this where I come from. This must be something they serve in fly over country only.

Stage Hand: That’s Nacho Cheese…

Biden: (Interrupting) It is so my cheese.

Stage Hand: No, Mr. Biden, those are nacho cheese Dorito’s.

Biden: (Getting Angry..watch out for the flying hair plugs!) They are so my cheese Dorito’s. Aren’t you supposed to be clinging to God and guns…let go of my damn cheese you commoner!

Producer to Oprah: Mr. Biden appears to be on an important call right now, let’s go to our next guest.

Announcer: Our next guest is Presidential candidate/Messiah Barack Obama!

Audience: Yawn…We’ve seen enough of Mr. Empty Suit. Can’t you bring on that other guy, what’s his name…Rosie O’Donnell?

Producer: Queing Mr. Obama’s new theme song for his grand entry. Here it is:

It’s my party and I’ll Lie if I want to, Lie if I want to! by the Bidenettes (unless they get caught).

Biden: Then I’ll deny all knowledge and put a funny hat on Michael Dukakis, I mean Barack Obama. Make fun of him, not me. I have a dead cat on my head for God’s sake. Quit picking on me. Go pick on Jimmy Carter, Hell everybody knows he is senile. He thinks Fidel Castro is Hugh Hefner! I’ve seen the way he looks at him…lusting in his heart my ass!

Oprah: Welcome, Messiah Obama. Audience, Mr. Obama is going to Grace us today with a list of his accomplishments. Listen closely so you will be able to shut up those cranky conservatives at your next cocktail party.

Obama: (Smiling at audience) Thank you for having me here today, Orca…I mean Oprah. My, that is a lovely shade of lipstick you are wearing!

Obama’s phone buzzes: (Jumps up, waves goodbye, and shouts over his shoulder as he leaves the stage) Uh oh, I have to go now, I just received an emergency text message from George Soros telling me to shut my mouth until he pulls the strings. I’m not really sure what that means…

Oprah: Wow! What an impressive list of accomplishments for Mr. Obama. Let’s get some feedback from an audience member.

Pudgy red head in audience: Isn’t he just dreamy?

Oprah: What do you think of his accomplishments?

Pudgy red head in audience: He’s for change. He sends tingles down my legs!

Oprah: Wow, another convert. Thank you, sister.

Pudgy red head in audience: Hey, I’m not your sister. I’m Chris Matthews from the DNC, I mean NBC. Damnit, I have to get those straight. Otherwise, I might get fired and end up as a crappy sports announcer or even worse, only be available on MSNBC. Nobody watches that crap, not even the people on their payroll! Wait, I can save my job by giving them a new slogan…I’ll steal from the U.S. Army (I knew they were good for something)…MSNBC..an audience of One!

Oprah: Well, that is all the time we have for today folks. Be sure to tune in tomorrow when my guests will be Al “Macho Man” Gore, Jesse “The Jackass” Jackson and America’s favorite crazy, racist SOB, the Rev. Wright. Goodbye!

Backstabbers began playing again and I woke up from my dream.

Back to reality, the Democrats are still lying and the liberals are still buying.